Pondering...

The time change is throwing me off but in adverse effect so ....I am still awake.

Sitting in the hotel while everyone is sleeping and listening to Sufjan, he really has made this trip something new for me. I am so utterly confused. Nashville, New York, Cali, New York, Cali, Nashville. This trip was suppose to help was it not? I go to New york and instantly am turned off, I was so in love with the hustle and bustle of the city but now it just drains me. I get a sense of urgency and want to get things done but at the same time between my calmer attitude verses two years ago and for the fact it is hands down the most expensive of the three I will pass for now. It will be slightly difficult to do Matt's project from here but, well I will figure that out. Got to Nashville and was a bit hesitant on the fact it seemed to spaced out and small town ... the longer I spent here tho I really began to enjoy it. Music Row alone gives me chills with what seems to be a few hundred companies, but jobs are jobs and they are all full right now. Then today in the mist of job hunting I get offered a student internship at Sony, however, the rep for Sony student internships is being used, abused and then left with no sense of even being able to move on...oh yea and its expensive ...very... oh and I have no one to live with... this trip really has done nothing but confuse me. I feel like I have found somewhere that I can be happy and then something else comes along... what next LONDON? (yes prease!)

I need a bottle of wine and a good listener to help me figure this out...

I started a side project on this road trip "The need to belong; ... I haven't come up with the rest of it. I began taking pictures in New York of those belonging and the lengths they go to belong, I am attempting to see those in my pictures who are attempting but failing, attempting but hating it and attempting successfully to their surroundings.

Something along those lines....

I think this is speaking volumes of what I am feeling right now, I hope they help me find the answers.